Craving Taco Bell? Make this instead.

Last September, when I was working on the State Auditor's campaign in Columbus, my car disappeared from a city street. After the city insisted they hadn't towed it and that my VIN number wasn't in the system, I reported it stolen and assumed I'd never see it again. 

Imagine my surprise when I got a notice several weeks later that it was sitting in a police impound lot. My first thoughts were "What the hell happened to my car?" followed by "oh God. It's going to reek."

By that point, it had been sitting in an open lot in 80-degree heat for days on end, and I'd picked up McDonald's on my way to work that day and left a half-eaten burger in the bag on the front seat. I was pretty sure I had other fast food bags with old fries and nuggets in there, too. (Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was a slob. I try to clean my car more often now.) When I got to the impound lot, I held my breath before I opened the door, expecting to get a whiff of mold and rotting meat. Instead...nothing. The half-eaten burger and fries were still in there, but they were completely fossilized. The meat, bread and fries were hard as rock, and instead of molding, the cheese had a plastic-like consistency. Huh.

At the time, I was just relieved that I didn't have to smell putrid, rotting food the whole way home. But meat and cheese is supposed to spoil. Bread is supposed to mold. I should've drawn one of two conclusions: 1. There's a lot of preservatives in that burger, or 2. it's not real food.

It took making and learning about food to discover that both conclusions are actually true. (Here's some scary proof.) In fact, if you start researching fast food, you'll find out all sorts of interesting things. Like that fast food is preserved with chemicals that are more commonly used in laundry detergents and industrial paints (ethoxylate), flame retardants (ammonium sulfate), and plastics (calcium chloride, which is also used to set concrete--no wonder my burger was rock solid). And that the taste and smell of fast food is manufactured in a lab. And that even at places like Subway, where you can "eat fresh," they douse the lettuce and vegetables with propylene glycerol to keep them from wilting. Propylene glycerol is generally used in products like antifreeze. Mmm....antifreeze.

Okay, I think you get my point: fast food is even worse for you than you thought, and I haven't even gotten to the calorie counts yet. (If you want to learn more and can handle a 200-page gross-out, I highly recommend reading Fast Food Nation by Eric Schlosser. If you don't have the stomach or the patience, you could also rent the documentary Supersize Me.) We know this. And yet 41 percent of Americans eat it at least once a week, and for Americans 18-29, that number is almost 60 percent.Generally, people acknowledge that it's bad for them but offer three reasons to eat it anyway:

1. I can't afford anything else.

2. I don't have time to cook.

3. It tastes better than anything I can make at home.

Those were the excuses I always used, anyway.

Once I started this blog, I started thinking of healthy ways to satisfy fast food cravings and address the problem of time and cost without actually hitting up the drive-thru. Consider this the first in a series. I'll start with the worst of the worst: Taco Bell, or as I prefer to call it, Taco Hell.

First of all: ugh. I can't believe people were surprised when Taco Bell came out and admitted last year that their "beef" isn't technically beef, it's "taco filling," which is 36% beef and 64% "tasteless fibers, various industrial additives and some flavoring and coloring." And all that cheese? It's a lab-manufactured synthetic product made to taste like cheese.

Oh, and that $5 box and soda will cost you almost 1,600 calories, 73 grams of fat, and 2 days worth of salt. (Salt causes the body to retain water, making you look puffy and bloated. So even if you're not fat, you'll feel like you are.)

Unlike with some fast food joints, most people acknowledge that Taco Bell is disgusting. In fact, for some people, the fact that it's disgusting is part of the thrill. I knew a guy in college who claimed that he and his roommates used to go there, order the nastiest slop on the menu, and then see who had to, uh, "relieve himself" first. (I was simultaneously grossed out and baffled. Since Taco Bell has no fiber and is mostly synthetic, I imagine it sitting in your stomach in a congealed ball. But I digress.)

Still, I understand the urge to chow down on a pile of beef, cheese, and sour cream, especially when you're famished. I used to occasionally drive through Taco Bell when I was starving and order a Grilled Stuffed Burrito and a side of nachos. (That'll be 1,100 calories, please!) Therefore, I came up with a solution: taco casserole.

Beefy deliciousness.

Don't let appearances deceive you. The calorie count is 321 calories for 1/6 of the casserole (which is a pretty big portion), and it's loaded with fiber and protein. The ingredients cost me about $12 total--and considering this recipe makes six servings, it's much cheaper than Taco Bell.

Not to mention the beef and cheese is actually real.

I made this on Saturday night because Kyle and I were going to a friend's place to watch the OSU basketball game with a group of people. But this is also a good thing to make ahead of time and keep in the refrigerator or freezer--that way, when you're driving home and the drive-thru urge strikes, all you have to do is stick it in the oven.

Ingredients:

1/2 pound extra-lean ground beef

1 15-oz can of pinto beans, rinsed and drained

1 15-oz can of red chili beans, rinsed and drained

1/2 cup chopped white onion

1/2 cup chopped green peppers

1 8-oz carton of light sour cream

2 tablespoons of flour

1 15-oz can of no-salt-added tomato sauce

8 6-inch whole wheat flour tortillas (there are a couple brands that sell high-fiber, high-protein, low-calorie tortillas)

1 packet of taco seasoning

1 cup of reduced-fat shredded cheddar cheese

Directions:

1. Preheat the oven to 350. In a large skillet, cook ground beef and onion until meat is brown and onion is tender. Stir in green peppers and half the taco seasoning. Cook for 1 minute more and remove from heat. Add beans.

2. In a bowl, combine sour cream, flour, and the rest of the taco seasoning; set aside.

3. Place half of the tortillas in a bottom of a baking dish, overlapping as necessary. Top evenly with half of the meat mixture. Spoon half of the sour cream mixture over meat mixture in small mounds; spread in an even layer. Top with half of the tomato sauce. Repeat with another layer.

4. Cover the baking dish with foil and bake for 35 minutes. Pull it out of the oven and sprinkle the cheese on top. Bake, uncovered, for 5 more minutes or until cheese is melted.

And, yes, it was a hit on Saturday night.

Fred enjoys some taco casserole and vows to never eat at Taco Hell again.